My Sweet Girls!

Leave it to my two sweet wonderful girls to know just how to cheer me up! I got a big surprise package from The Land of Nod a few days ago! Inside was the cutest toy! A lady bug ride on toy for Kaelin! I absolutely love it and I have actually had my eye on it in the Land of Nod catalogue for some time now. They had no idea that I wanted it! I guess they know me too well! I can't wait to see Kaelin riding it around the house! How cute that will be!

Marie and Sarah, you are the best daughters a mom could ever have, and I love you both all the way around the world and back a million billion times!

A Poem

Dedicated to my beautiful mom

Tears

Let yourself cry

Tears are the balm of the soul

Tears are cleansing

Tears are healing

Tears are renewing

Crying rids the body of toxins and the soul of illusions

Sometimes we see clearly only through the blur of tears

They wash away the layers of self sufficiency and pretension to reveal the core of us

That is pure spirit ~ resilient and immortal

author unknown

Referrals are on their way!

Well, it's that time again! Our agency is expecting to receive referrals for families logged in through December 8th, '05 this week. Why does it seem that every month referrals come, we still have about a 6 month wait? I think, this time, we can honestly say, "6 more months!" If CCAA stays consistent in doing 1 week's worth of LID's per month, then it will take them at least 6 more months to make it to our LID of January 23, '06.

Dec 9-16 in Dec

Dec 17-24 in Jan

Dec 25-31 in Feb

Jan 1-7 in Mar

Jan 8- 15 in Apr

Jan 16-23 in May (US!)

Although, 6 months seems like an eternity, it is actually just enough time to finish Kaelin's bedroom, install a new kitchen floor, clean and organize our house top to bottom, baby-proof everything, and buy everything on my packing list! Yikes! All of the sudden I'm feeling fairly panicked, here!

Congratulations to all of the families getting their referrals this month! Especially to our friends, Cheri and Shane, who are going to see their daughter, Hope's, sweet little face this week! We are so excited for you!

Happy Birthday! Sarah!

Today is our babygirl's birthday! I woke up this morning thinking how could this be? How in the heck is our little girl 22 already?! Sarah, better known as "Bunny" (nickname given to her when she was a week old by her big brother, Adam) was such a beautiful baby when she was born! She actually looked Asian! She had (and still does) gorgeous dark brown (almost black) shiny hair, big brown eyes! What a beauty! Sarah has brought so much joy to our lives and is such an exceptional daughter! I wish she could be home on her birthday, but she is in Memphis working hard on her Master's degree in Dietetics. We miss her so much and can't wait to see her on Thanksgiving. WE LOVE YOU, BUNNY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

21!

Yep, we've been logged in at CCAA for 21 looong months! Now that CCAA is finally working on December of '05, maybe we'll see some real progress this month with referrals. There is a rumor over on RQ that CCAA has matched through the 10th! I'm not even going to get excited about this one! But I am crossing everything I can possibly cross that this is the case! There is also a thread over on RQ that talks about January '06 already being matched. If this is true, then how sad is it that our dossier could have a photo of our daughter attached to it and it is just sitting on somebody's desk collecting dust! Even more disturbing is to think that whether we've been matched or not, our daughter could possibly be sitting in a crib (with no mattress) cold, hungry, or wet with no one to tend to her! While we are here just dying to hold her, feed her, comfort her, play with her, keep her warm, and most importantly, LOVE her! I try not to think about that so much as we pray every day for the opposite: That she is being well cared for in her SWI or, even better, in a loving foster care home. Every night we pray that her guardian angel will whisper in her little ear, "Mama and baba are coming, just hold on a little longer."

It's Been a While....

I love this picture of my mom and dad (taken last year)! I know it's been a while since my last post, but my focus has been on my mom this last month. She is now out of the hospital and in a nursing home. I go there every day to see her and make sure she is getting what she needs. Even though, she appears to be getting good care, it is still such a depressing and sobering place. Nothing makes you think about your own mortality like a visit to a nursing home. It is so hard to see my mom in this condition. This is not the mom I once knew. I wish her doctors and nurses could have known her before she became this way! I wish they could know what a wonderful, intelligent, and talented woman she was/is! At least she is still so beautiful ! So many times her nurses comment on what a beautiful woman she is! The good thing is that she still recognizes her family and we are so thankful for that! But, she has lost her ability to walk or even sit up, and only stays awake for short periods. One thing she has not lost is her ability to hear! Yesterday, I said something funny to her nurse and mom laughed right out loud! We thought she was asleep! That brought such joy to my heart! No one really knows, except God, how much time my mom has, but she sure is fighting to hang on and we are so glad for that!

On another note, I turned 46 last week! It really didn't even phase me, either. I don't feel any different than when I turned 40! Except that my feet have been hurting when I get out of bed in the morning! Maybe I just need new tennies, I hope! Age is just a number, anyway, right?

Prayers for my Mom

Sorry that I have not posted in a while. My mom is very sick. She has a weak heart along with serious liver and thyroid problems too. I have been spending most of my time sitting by her hospital bed. We are hopeful that the treatments her doctors are trying will help. We are praying that she will come out of this and survive, but we just don't know and neither do the doctors, really. Only time will tell.

My mom is a very wonderful and talented woman. She is also a very gifted seamstress and quilter. Above is a photo of one of her masterpieces! This quilt is my most cherished possesion and I will treasure it always! It is called "Heritage Medallion" and it is all hand quilted by my beautiful mom!

It is our prayer that my mom will be able to meet her 17th grandchild! Please pray for my mom.

Today is our 20th LID anniversary.

Grouchy Red Pepper!

Sarah planted a pepper plant last spring and this is what it produced; just this one little grouchy red pepper! Sometimes I know just how he feels!

649 Down! 119 to Go!

Back in May of 2006 I started a paperclip chain. Each paperclip represented a family with an LID before ours waiting for referral with our adoption agency. My chain has now gone from 649 paperclips/families down to only 119 paperclips! We are definitely getting there! Since our agency received 22 referrals, I was able to take off that many paperclips this month!

I wish I had started this chain when we first became LID, then there would have been even more paperclips to start with!

Referrals!

Yesterday, (I'm a little behind posting) our agency received 22 referrals, all girls! This time CCAA made it to November 25, '05! Considering Nov 22 and 23 were big LID days this is sort of good! December of '05 is said to be smaller than November so, hopefully, things will move a little faster once they are completely out of November. Here is my prediction or WAG:
Finish November and up to December 5th in October '07
December 6-20 in November'07

December 21-31 in December '07

January 1-12 in January '08

January 13-23 in February '08 (US!)

So now, since Chinese New Year is on February 7, '08 and CCAA will be closed that whole week, I am thinking that we should get our referral the week of mine and Gary's 26th Wedding Anniversary which is Feb 11! Wouldn't that be the most amazing gift?!

Or, even better, CCAA mails referrals before Chinese New Year and we see Kaelin's sweet little face in the end of January! It feels so good to finally see a light at the end of this loooooooong tunnel!